Monday, September 28, 2009

and the scales fell from my eyes...

I had a semi revelation this weekend. After a couple of days of moping and feeling sorry for myself, I began to question why I treat myself the way I do? Why do long to lose weight in order to be healthy, and yet sabotage myself with overeating and laziness?

As I questioned myself, I wondered, “Am I worth it?” Do I really believe my life deserves to be a happy and healthy one? The answer is, YES! Many times I let the voice of worldly perfection creep in and tell me that I’ll never be as skinny as the anorexic super models, and then I get discouraged, give up and force feed myself an abundance of junk. Like I really want to be that skinny anyway, pshaw!

I just want to be healthy, happy, energetic, and to feel youthful. I am, by the way, only 25. I do deserve the premier player’s club treatment.

Calories in/Calories out

I didn't keep very good track of what I ate on Friday and Saturday. I am pretty sure I ate around 2000 calories though. :( I also didn't exercise again on Friday. See the self sabotage! It's disgusting.

However, click here to see what I ate yesterday (Sunday)l went over, but at least I kept track.

Calories in: 1725 (Though I think I ate a few more things that I couldn't remember)

Calories out: 632

I did 90 minutes of working out: A 40 minute walk with Maddie; 30 minutes of Free Step with weights on the Wii Fit; and 20 minutes of Tae Bo. I did 90 minutes to make up for no exercise on Thursday and Friday. Sunday was supposed to be my day of rest. :)

Some pictures of what I ate yesterday:

1/2 cup organic vanilla yogurt, 1/2 cup blueberries, 1/2 cup pineapple chunks and a smooshed up Crunchy Nature Valley Bar. This makes a very good meal.

Corn tortillas baked in the oven. A mixture of romaine lettuce, tomatoes, black beans, chicken, salsa, light ranch, and bbq sauce.
Below is a banana with a couple spoonfuls of yogurt, 1 tbsp peanut butter and 10 chocolate chips melted with the PB. Pretty good desert. :)

Meal Plan Monday:
Monday: Spaghetti
Tuesday: Chicken & Black bean enchiladas
Wednesday: Dinner at ma's house
Thursday: ?? I'll be at a convention for work
Friday: Paninis
Saturday: Subway? (I decided I have to leave room for Subway. I'm going to eat it anyway :P)
Sunday: I haven't made it this far yet
Also, see everything I have planned for today: Click Here.
I'm right on track so far. I just need to make it past dinner. :) Oh and I did exercise this morning, a 1/2 hour walk with Maddie.
I hope you all have a fabulous Monday!


  1. I love that you have a plan and that you hold yourself accountable! I truly think that's a huge step. Just remember, you don't have to be "perfect." Every step in the right direction helps!

    Have a great week, Shawnee! :)

  2. Keep on going girl!
    I recently, after years of denial, went from a size 12 to a 4. It has taken me years to do this. First I changed my eating habits and went from a 12 to an 8. I thought, cool! I look good! But then I realized that I still wasn't healthy. It became less about looking good and more about being able to say that I was doing right by my body. I worked out all summer long, 5 days a week. I finally am down to a 4 and working out 4 days a week to maintain. I have never felt better and I want the same feeling for you and everyone out there! If you need help, support, tips, a workout plan- email me!
    Good Luck!

  3. Thank you both for the encouragement and the inspiration! :) I really need it.

  4. Your revelation is the start of understanding how you (and all of us, you're really not alone in this) manage to self-sabotage.

    So your 'struggle' is with food, mine is with relationships, and other people will have other struggles. We all set out with great intentions but quite often we still fail to get where we want to go.

    And it's only when we can look ourselves in the eye and ask whether we *really do* deserve this - whatever *this* is - that we can start to halt the self-sabotage

    So congratulations on having the scales fall from your eyes... :-)


  5. Thanks steve for the encouragement! I really need it, and it is really helpful to know there are some people who understand.